Being your own hero is about rising to the occasion and
being the best you can be. Striving toward being a hero in your own life means
living with purpose and conviction, helping others, and being a leader (most
superheroes have side-kicks, henchmen, fans, or followers). You can learn to be
your own hero by improving yourself and developing hero-like qualities, setting
and achieving goals, and helping others.
Enhance
your integrity. Think of a personal hero--real,
fictional, dead or alive. What are the qualities you look up to in this person?
If you don't have one, you can create one based on the qualities you most
admire in people or would love to possess. Chances are that this hero you have
in mind will have integrity. Being a credible hero is about being trustworthy,
and having strong moral values (sense of right and wrong).
- Be honest. Integrity is also about being honest. Communicate your feelings and thoughts respectfully and assertively. This means not being afraid to say how you feel. Use "I statements" such as, "I feel ____, when you ____." For example, you might say, "I feel angry when you hurt other people."
- Follow through. If you say you are going to do something, do it. Otherwise, don't make false promises if you aren't sure if you can follow through. Heroes are people that we can count on. They are dependable and consistent.
- Know your moral values. Identify your ethics and what you believe in to increase moral responsibility. Write a list of your moral values. For example, you might believe in freedom, equality, justice, and free speech.
- Identify what you disagree with and write these down. For example, you might be against: murder, stealing, harming yourself, harming others, cheating, and violence.
Be
courageous. Courage is another strong value of
a hero. Being courageous means having independence, facing your fears, and
being willing to take risks.
- Have the bravery and courage needed to face your fears instead of avoiding them. Choose personal growth over safety (the desire to feel comfortable). If you feel uncomfortable in a situation such as public speaking, all the more reason to cultivate this skill. Once your face your fear you may realize that it wasn't so bad or scary after all.
- Remember that having courage is not about doing risky things and putting yourself in unsafe situations. Always put safety first.
Look on
the bright side. Heroes do not dwell on the negative
because if they did they would not have enough energy to save people and fight
the bad guys. Heroes believe in themselves and think they can go up against
anyone at any time. Positive thinking can increase self-esteem and overall life
satisfaction. You are going to need that positive outlook and optimism to be a
confident hero in your life.
- Stop complaining and start living! When you find yourself getting down about the current situation, do something to get your mind off of it. Try taking a walk, taking deep breaths, or focusing on a task.
- Develop a positive mantra. Heroes tend to have slogans or words to live by. Some examples of superhero slogans include, “I’m the best there is at what I do" (Wolverine) and “With great power comes great responsibility" (Spiderman).
Acknowledge
your weaknesses. Self-awareness is an important
component of being a good hero. Being your own hero is not about feigning a
false image of yourself to the world or becoming a narcissist without true
integrity. Being your own hero is about knowing your strengths as well as your
downfalls. Even Superman was weak to kryptonite.
- Take personal responsibility for your part. Admit your mistakes and don’t blame your situation on others. Apologize when you need to.
- Identify solutions and learn from your mistakes. Consider some situations in life (school, work, family) you think could have gone better. Next, play out these scenes as your hero. How would a hero have acted in the same situations? What would a hero have said or done?
- Instead of focusing too much on your flaws, pay attention to what you can improve upon. Look at these mistakes or weaknesses as areas of personal growth. Tell yourself something like, "I am continually growing and developing. I am open to improving myself through new experiences."
Regulate
your emotions. Heroes are calm in the face of
danger. If you find yourself getting upset try stopping yourself and taking a
step back from the situation.
- Think before you act. Stop and take a breath if that helps you. Observe your thoughts and feelings.
- Practice coping resources that work for you. Some examples include: exercising, talking with a friend, writing in a journal, and meditating.
