Thursday, 28 March 2019
Simple Way to Acquire Wealth
00:07:00
Lemme tell you what I realized recently.
Do u know the wealth and riches of God is far beyond human understanding?
Lemme start with this...
God created man and animal, the population of man is almost 8billion as at today also the population of animal. Let's not forget the aquatic animals... There are billions of them and a lot has not been discovered yet.
God created Earth and other planets.. Did u know there are thousands of planets and many more not yet discovered?
God created Stars. Did u know a star on its own constitutes many planets? And also SUN is the closest star to our universe and imagine how hot it is. There are billions of stars in the sky.
Did u know there is a planet full of diamond but it will take human being thousands of light-year to get there.
He also created the heavens not just the one we can see merely looking up.
And did u know no one knows the end of the sky or where it starts from.
And many more of his wealth and riches that I can't talk of.
And all you are chasing is car, house, money, power on the Earth that is nothing compared to his riches and wealth.
Think very well on this and you will realize that what you need is a close relationship with God and every other thing shall be given to you.
No wonder Jesus doesn't talk much about worldly riches. He only told us to 'seek first the kingdom of God and His Righteousness and every other thing shall be added'.
Then I realize that this world is nothing to God to give me. All I have to do is know him and do his will.
Sincerely, there is nothing more important that we need on earth than to seek and please the owner of it.
Imagine knowing a rich man, you will always want to please him so he can give out of his riches to you.
You can't have a rich father and still be suffering. Remember the story of the prodigal son.
Then why is it hard to please the one who owns it all.
Remember what he says in Deuteronomy 28. Hearken diligently unto Him. That's all you need.
Wealth is nothing for God to give you. But he can't give it to someone he who doesn't know him or who is not ready to manage it well. Get to know God today.
Healthwise: I get to know that all of our body parts has its spare with God. Whichever sickness you're going through God can heal you. Just seek Him.
He watches all of us. Please don't die in your ignorance. You need God first.
Monday, 4 March 2019
How to Control Your Lustful Action
01:33:00
It is bound to happen! Rather you're searching the Internet when no one is watching you, and you Google a raunchy website. Or you look at the magazine section of the book store when your eyes come across a model on the front cover of "Playboy". Eventually, you will come across a moment in your life when you fall into sexual temptation. This article will give you a few tips on how to overcome your lust, and teach you some things that you need to know about it!
Learn that sexuality is completely natural! Believe it or not, a vast majority of human beings on this Earth have sexual desires! However, some people have allowed their sexuality to become such a huge part of their lives to the point where it is corrupts them. This is especially common in teenagers who are just being introduced to the world of sexuality. If this is you, then don't worry! There is a solution to your problem.
Try to control your eyes. A key to control your temptation is to keep your eyes away from the parts of people which might invoke lustful thoughts, or keep them off of certain people in general. This is especially important to do in environments such as the beach or the gym; where there are often people who are in skin-tight and very revealing clothing. If you can keep your eyes clean, then eventually your thoughts will become clean. So when you're looking at someone, try to keep your eyes focused above their shoulders.
Try to get help from someone else if you can. Think of temptation like a sumo wrestler. Every time you fall into temptation and do what it wants you to do, it will be like giving it food. It will become bigger every single day until it's uncontrollable. Then when you realize you need to get rid of that sumo, you can't defeat it by yourself. What you need to do is to have someone you can trust help you with your lustful thoughts. You may even find out that they went through the same things you went through!
Find other things to do. Often times we commit lustful actions when we are alone or have nothing else to do, so it's best to do other things to keep your mind off of lustful thoughts. Some good examples include hobbies such as games and sports, or socializing with other people.
Realize that you are not alone. You are not the only one who is struggling to control your lust. These problems are especially common in teenagers who are going through puberty and are discovering their sexuality. But many people who struggle with lust tend to forget about this, or don't even know this fact at all! So not only is what you're going through natural, especially if you are a teenager, you are also not the only one going through this! You'll lose that "guilty conscience" once you do, and find the strength to overcome your lust!
Thursday, 1 November 2018
Power In Man (Mathematics of Life)
09:13:00
2 & 3 are two different numbers. Start the counting from 0, 1 to 10, skip 2 and include 3 or include 2 and skip 3 makes the counting incomplete. The role of the two numbers is inevitable.
The square of 2 is 4 and the square of 3 is 9, the two have different square value (Power of Multiplication). 3 have the higher “Power of Multiplication” compared to 2. And 3 tends to “Infinity” faster than 2.
1 is a figure which when raised to power of any number gives 1. Its power of multiplication add no difference to its original. 2 & 3 are divisible by 1, simply means 1 is a “Common Factor” of 2 & 3, so its a Constant that exist among numbers.
0 is a figure when multiplied by any number gives 0 and when it is use to divide any number gives “Error”. 0 is not an appreciative number among others and even reduce the value of any number to itself, and 1 is always constant to all figures.
2 cannot live the Life of 3 and 0 cannot do the work of 1, the difference is simply clear.
Some people do compare their Life with another person’s Life. 2 & 3 represent two different man with different abilities and talents. Their abilities and talents determines their “Power of Multiplication”. No matter how high or small the power is, it all tends to “Success”. So, its a choice to determine how fast you want to make it.
Taking shortcut is like dividing a number by 0, the whole abilities and talents will be in vain for someone who tends to take shortcut and this will lead to the destruction of all efforts so far.
The “Common Factor”, 1, of 2 & 3 represents something constant about man which is “CHANGE”.
As long as there is no number which is not divisible by 1, so also is no man on Earth that cannot experience change as long as he is willing to.
Life is in phases and change brings about the movement from one phase to another. Change is an important tool in the Life of someone who desires success.
Is not really good comparing your Lifestyle with someone else own. The role of 2 is different from 3’s role, so also we have different roles to play.
It is better to realise “Who I am” because, upon the true realisation of “I” comes Power.
Two people can never be the same, we have different star, so live your life and we need to work together to make the counting complete.
Never be bothered if someone makes it faster before you. Its a race and we all gonna get to the finish line as long as we keep running no matter the obstacles.
Your duty, my duty is important. So don’t give up and you will make it before you could look up.
Tuesday, 18 September 2018
10:22:00
The Holy Spirit is in each one of us to guide us and direct us. The Scripture talks about our inner ear, not our physical ear. You won’t hear an audible voice, but if you’ll be sensitive to what your inner ear is hearing, the still small voice, the promptings, the suggestions, the alarms, then God will save you from heartache and pain. He’ll lead you into promotion and favor. He’ll whisper secrets in your ear. Your remaining days on earth are blessed in Jesus name. Amen.
Monday, 2 July 2018
Discovering Who You Are
21:22:00
To find yourself first learn about yourself. Finding the real you is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for yourself, for once. It's a hard feeling to put into words, but when you don't know who you are, it's hard to ignore. Finding yourself is not easy, but it's worth it.
Create your own life timeline: Write down all of your major goals that you feel you have achieved and want to achieve. In turn, write down the events in your life that have already happened and that have shaped or affected you. When life brings problems or misfortunes it shapes our belief system and makes us think differently, but it also makes us us. These things you list are organically you, not a simple reflection of society. This isn't an exercise in wallowing. It's about clarification and identification of issues. These issues might be keeping you from reaching your present potential and letting your true self blossom. Spend a little time clarifying the past in your timeline. A timeline is an incredibly objective method for marking down past occurrences in your life that you consider to be major. You can look at them as formation blocks and as changing experiences along your timeline without imbuing them with too much emotion (as would occur within a diary account). As if writing a résumé, keep it simple, real, and condensed to the major effects or lessons learned from each past incident. When analyzing negative past experiences, focus on what you learned from them. Everyone has these blips in their timeline, but exaggerating or ignoring them won't help you. Instead, recognize that these experiences shaped you. Reader Approved How to Find Yourself "To find yourself first learn about yourself." Finding the real you is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for yourself, for once. It's a hard feeling to put into words, but when you don't know who you are, it's hard to ignore. Finding yourself is not easy, but it's worth it. Ready? Let's begin. Part One of Four: Waking Your Conscious Edit Image titled Find Yourself Step 1 1 Create your own life timeline. Write down all of your major goals that you feel you have achieved and want to achieve. In turn, write down the events in your life that have already happened and that have shaped or affected you. When life brings problems or misfortunes it shapes our belief system and makes us think differently, but it also makes us us. These things you list are organically you, not a simple reflection of society. This isn't an exercise in wallowing. It's about clarification and identification of issues. These issues might be keeping you from reaching your present potential and letting your true self blossom. Spend a little time clarifying the past in your timeline. A timeline is an incredibly objective method for marking down past occurrences in your life that you consider to be major. You can look at them as formation blocks and as changing experiences along your timeline without imbuing them with too much emotion (as would occur within a diary account). As if writing a résumé, keep it simple, real, and condensed to the major effects or lessons learned from each past incident. When analyzing negative past experiences, focus on what you learned from them. Everyone has these blips in their timeline, but exaggerating or ignoring them won't help you. Instead, recognize that these experiences shaped you.
Distinguish your thoughts from the thoughts of others: For most people (it's more common than you may think) life is pretty easy to go through while on autopilot; we practically get handed a road map for how reality "works." Go to school, get a job, get married, think this, that, and the other, and boom — hope you had a good time. And that's all well and good — it gets the job done certainly — but it doesn't allow room for you. So sit down with yourself. At the end of the timeline, come up with a few beliefs of yours that aren't based on logic, but are based on what you've been told. We all have them. Now, what do you actually think? Society has a very covert way of handing us the "misfits", condemning the "losers", idolizing the "beautiful", alienating the "strange." But here's a heads up: These describing words have no basis in reality. How do you feel about the world around you? Think about what you believe to be good and bad — not what anyone else has told you. Feel free to think more concretely. Do you actually agree with your parents' political or religious affiliations? Is having a career really the most important thing to you? Do thick, black glasses really make you feel "cooler?" If the answer is no, great! There's absolutely zero problems with not molding yourself to pre-existing norms. Now all you have to do is unlearn and then relearn. Only this time, relearn based on your gut.
Start relying on yourself: Confidence and reliance are at the heart of finding yourself. If you don't have a solid sense of self-worth, you'll listen to what others have to say all the time and to be swayed by their insistence on what is appropriate. Learn to believe in yourself and trust your own feelings. Then, you'll come up with a structure to base your new sense of self on. Remember, be patient with yourself and confident in your abilities. Everything will come with time. If you have been victimized in the past, confront these issues. They're not going to go away on their own. They might be coloring your approach to daily life, causing you to live up to other people's expectations instead of your own. Start trusting your own judgment and decision-making processes, mistakes and all. We all make mistakes, but through mistakes we find ourselves growing, learning, and reaching our real selves. Start taking responsibility for budgeting, household matters, and planning about the future. People who lack a sense of self tend to disregard the "details" of life with a carefree attitude, believing that things will all sort themselves out. But things don't always sort themselves out. Taking responsibility pulls you back from the precipice and lets you be self-reliant and self-determined, no longer carried along by the waves of fate. Reader Approved How to Find Yourself "To find yourself first learn about yourself." Finding the real you is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for yourself, for once. It's a hard feeling to put into words, but when you don't know who you are, it's hard to ignore. Finding yourself is not easy, but it's worth it. Ready? Let's begin. Part One of Four: Waking Your Conscious Edit Image titled Find Yourself Step 1 1 Create your own life timeline. Write down all of your major goals that you feel you have achieved and want to achieve. In turn, write down the events in your life that have already happened and that have shaped or affected you. When life brings problems or misfortunes it shapes our belief system and makes us think differently, but it also makes us us. These things you list are organically you, not a simple reflection of society. This isn't an exercise in wallowing. It's about clarification and identification of issues. These issues might be keeping you from reaching your present potential and letting your true self blossom. Spend a little time clarifying the past in your timeline. A timeline is an incredibly objective method for marking down past occurrences in your life that you consider to be major. You can look at them as formation blocks and as changing experiences along your timeline without imbuing them with too much emotion (as would occur within a diary account). As if writing a résumé, keep it simple, real, and condensed to the major effects or lessons learned from each past incident. When analyzing negative past experiences, focus on what you learned from them. Everyone has these blips in their timeline, but exaggerating or ignoring them won't help you. Instead, recognize that these experiences shaped you. Image titled Find Yourself Step 2 2 Distinguish your thoughts from the thoughts of others. For most people (it's more common than you may think) life is pretty easy to go through while on autopilot; we practically get handed a road map for how reality "works." Go to school, get a job, get married, think this, that, and the other, and boom — hope you had a good time. And that's all well and good — it gets the job done certainly — but it doesn't allow room for you. So sit down with yourself. At the end of the timeline, come up with a few beliefs of yours that aren't based on logic, but are based on what you've been told. We all have them. Now, what do you actually think? Society has a very covert way of handing us the "misfits", condemning the "losers", idolizing the "beautiful", alienating the "strange." But here's a heads up: These describing words have no basis in reality. How do you feel about the world around you? Think about what you believe to be good and bad — not what anyone else has told you. Feel free to think more concretely. Do you actually agree with your parents' political or religious affiliations? Is having a career really the most important thing to you? Do thick, black glasses really make you feel "cooler?" If the answer is no, great! There's absolutely zero problems with not molding yourself to pre-existing norms. Now all you have to do is unlearn and then relearn. Only this time, relearn based on your gut. Image titled Find Yourself Step 3 3 Start relying on yourself. Confidence and reliance are at the heart of finding yourself. If you don't have a solid sense of self-worth, you'll listen to what others have to say all the time and to be swayed by their insistence on what is appropriate. Learn to believe in yourself and trust your own feelings. Then, you'll come up with a structure to base your new sense of self on. Remember, be patient with yourself and confident in your abilities. Everything will come with time. If you have been victimized in the past, confront these issues. They're not going to go away on their own. They might be coloring your approach to daily life, causing you to live up to other people's expectations instead of your own. Start trusting your own judgment and decision-making processes, mistakes and all. We all make mistakes, but through mistakes we find ourselves growing, learning, and reaching our real selves. Start taking responsibility for budgeting, household matters, and planning about the future. People who lack a sense of self tend to disregard the "details" of life with a carefree attitude, believing that things will all sort themselves out. But things don't always sort themselves out. Taking responsibility pulls you back from the precipice and lets you be self-reliant and self-determined, no longer carried along by the waves of fate.
Prepare to begin again with a clean slate: Develop your own moral conduct and practice sticking to it. Start by overcoming bad habits. Stop smoking, over-eating, and abusive drinking. These are examples of lapses or habits that will prevent you from functioning at your peak. They also let you "off the hook" by sidestepping the analysis of why you use these crutches instead of finding better ways to brighten your life. This step may take some major rehabilitation for some individuals but putting it into the too-hard basket won't make it go away. Remember, you can't drive your life forward if you are always gazing through your rear-view mirror! Reader Approved How to Find Yourself "To find yourself first learn about yourself." Finding the real you is an enlightening experience. You become self-sufficient and do things for yourself, for once. It's a hard feeling to put into words, but when you don't know who you are, it's hard to ignore. Finding yourself is not easy, but it's worth it. Ready? Let's begin. Part One of Four: Waking Your Conscious Edit Image titled Find Yourself Step 1 1 Create your own life timeline. Write down all of your major goals that you feel you have achieved and want to achieve. In turn, write down the events in your life that have already happened and that have shaped or affected you. When life brings problems or misfortunes it shapes our belief system and makes us think differently, but it also makes us us. These things you list are organically you, not a simple reflection of society. This isn't an exercise in wallowing. It's about clarification and identification of issues. These issues might be keeping you from reaching your present potential and letting your true self blossom. Spend a little time clarifying the past in your timeline. A timeline is an incredibly objective method for marking down past occurrences in your life that you consider to be major. You can look at them as formation blocks and as changing experiences along your timeline without imbuing them with too much emotion (as would occur within a diary account). As if writing a résumé, keep it simple, real, and condensed to the major effects or lessons learned from each past incident. When analyzing negative past experiences, focus on what you learned from them. Everyone has these blips in their timeline, but exaggerating or ignoring them won't help you. Instead, recognize that these experiences shaped you. Image titled Find Yourself Step 2 2 Distinguish your thoughts from the thoughts of others. For most people (it's more common than you may think) life is pretty easy to go through while on autopilot; we practically get handed a road map for how reality "works." Go to school, get a job, get married, think this, that, and the other, and boom — hope you had a good time. And that's all well and good — it gets the job done certainly — but it doesn't allow room for you. So sit down with yourself. At the end of the timeline, come up with a few beliefs of yours that aren't based on logic, but are based on what you've been told. We all have them. Now, what do you actually think? Society has a very covert way of handing us the "misfits", condemning the "losers", idolizing the "beautiful", alienating the "strange." But here's a heads up: These describing words have no basis in reality. How do you feel about the world around you? Think about what you believe to be good and bad — not what anyone else has told you. Feel free to think more concretely. Do you actually agree with your parents' political or religious affiliations? Is having a career really the most important thing to you? Do thick, black glasses really make you feel "cooler?" If the answer is no, great! There's absolutely zero problems with not molding yourself to pre-existing norms. Now all you have to do is unlearn and then relearn. Only this time, relearn based on your gut. Image titled Find Yourself Step 3 3 Start relying on yourself. Confidence and reliance are at the heart of finding yourself. If you don't have a solid sense of self-worth, you'll listen to what others have to say all the time and to be swayed by their insistence on what is appropriate. Learn to believe in yourself and trust your own feelings. Then, you'll come up with a structure to base your new sense of self on. Remember, be patient with yourself and confident in your abilities. Everything will come with time. If you have been victimized in the past, confront these issues. They're not going to go away on their own. They might be coloring your approach to daily life, causing you to live up to other people's expectations instead of your own. Start trusting your own judgment and decision-making processes, mistakes and all. We all make mistakes, but through mistakes we find ourselves growing, learning, and reaching our real selves. Start taking responsibility for budgeting, household matters, and planning about the future. People who lack a sense of self tend to disregard the "details" of life with a carefree attitude, believing that things will all sort themselves out. But things don't always sort themselves out. Taking responsibility pulls you back from the precipice and lets you be self-reliant and self-determined, no longer carried along by the waves of fate. Image titled Find Yourself Step 4 4 Prepare to begin again with a clean slate. Develop your own moral conduct and practice sticking to it. Start by overcoming bad habits. Stop smoking, over-eating, and abusive drinking. These are examples of lapses or habits that will prevent you from functioning at your peak. They also let you "off the hook" by sidestepping the analysis of why you use these crutches instead of finding better ways to brighten your life. This step may take some major rehabilitation for some individuals but putting it into the too-hard basket won't make it go away. Remember, you can't drive your life forward if you are always gazing through your rear-view mirror!
Organize your world: You may find that having all your other affairs in order will help expedite the process to grabbing a firm hold on your identity. So clean your room. Do your homework. Resolve that fight with that friend. Getting everything else out of the way will clear up the path to "me" time. We all have excuses for why we're not growing in the direction we want to be growing — it could be money, school, a job, a relationship, you name it, someone's used it. If you're a busy bee, take strides to clear your schedule so you can sit down and tackle this thing head on. If it's always priority #2, it'll never get done.
Saturday, 14 April 2018
Changing Your Perspective On Life
01:59:00
Discover
your purpose. Feeling
as though your life has a purpose, that you have an impact
and you
are making the most of your abilities and your time, can infuse your life with
meaning. This may require you to try your hand at many different things. If photography
appeals to you, borrow a camera or take a class and see how you feel. Or maybe
you are interested in helping others and are good at communicating — try
tutoring to see if teaching helps you feel fulfilled. Other exercises that can
help you find your purpose:
- Picture yourself in old age, reflecting on your life. What sort of life would you have liked to live? Would you feel satisfied with a life spent traveling all over the world, but not necessarily raising a family? Or would you feel proud and content if you had a big, healthy family?
- Write down your strengths and talents. In what ways could you put these to use? In your job? As a volunteer or a friend?
- Each night for a week, take a moment to write down events and activities that gave you energy, pleasure, and a sense of purpose, and which events and activities did not. Go over the list at the end of the week and try to think of ways to maximize the enjoyable, energizing things in your life.
Figure out what is important to you. Everyone has different priorities; figuring out
what is important to you is essential to living a life that is meaningful. Make
a list of five things that are important to you, then consider whether the way
you are currently living your life aligns with these things. If not, how could
you change it to better incorporate the things that are important to you?
- You may want to list things like family or health. Or you may list things like creativity, growth, helping others, freedom, curiosity.
- If "creativity" is at the top of your list, but you work as an accountant, you may want to think about a job change, or find ways to incorporate creativity into your life (like taking a painting class, writing in your free time, acting in a community play, etc.).
Write down the reasons why you feel you need to add more meaning to your
life. Why do
you feel you need to do this? Have you experienced a big life event? Maybe you
feel like you are stuck in a rut. Whatever the reason, write down your reasons
for wanting to add meaning to your life. You can write them on paper or type
them on your computer. This will help you understand why it is important for
you, and also help you organize your thoughts.
- Understand the importance of purposeful living. Having a sense of purpose increases quality of life, and may even help you live longer.
- Be aware that meaning is not the same as happiness. You may be happy, but not be living a meaningful life. On the other hand, living a meaningful life does not necessarily mean you will be happy. That’s not to say that being happy is not important, but instead, that you should not expect finding meaning to mean finding happiness.
Set a goal for yourself. Think about something you have always wanted to
do. Maybe you want to get into the habit of jogging, or maybe you want to write
a novel. Regardless of what it is, setting a goal to complete this dream will
help you feel purposeful.
- If your goal is to run a marathon, then you can set that as your ultimate goal. However, it is important to break that goal down into more specific, manageable goals. There is plenty of evidence that suggests that breaking a big goal down into smaller, actionable steps makes you more likely to achieve that goal.
- Keep a journal of your progress. This will help you when you are feeling less motivated because it gives you an opportunity to re-motivate yourself, and to see how far you’ve already come.
Change the way you think about your career. Martin Luther King Jr. once
said, “whatever your life’s work, do it well.” If you have a job that you don’t
find meaningful, then focus on being the best at your job. This, in and of
itself, can add meaning because it requires you to go to work each day with a
goal in mind.
- You can also try to look for small ways that your jobs allow you to help others or even just yourself. For example, if you work at a day care, you are helping not only the children you care for, but also the families of the children by allowing them time to go to work or take care of personal things. If you’re a teacher, not only do you help other people learn, but you also learn many things about many topics too.
Become aware of the things for which you are grateful. It may sound silly, but taking
the time to write down or at least notice things you are grateful for can help
you feel like your life is more meaningful. Expressing gratitude for you have,
instead of worrying about what you do not have, can help you refocus and
connect with the world around you. Connecting with nature, other people, or a
higher power can help bring meaning to your life.
- For example, maybe you are grateful for you comfortable bed, maybe you are grateful that you don’t have to get up early in the morning, or that you have a friend you can call at any time of the day or night.
- Try to practice becoming mindful of the great things you have on a regular basis. Even if it is just noticing something that makes you feel grateful for a few extra seconds each day.
- Cultivating gratitude reminds us that, even when bad things happen or don't go the way we planned, there are still good things in our lives. Eliminating that feeling that you should always have more can help you see what is truly meaningful in your life.
Seek
help.
Sometimes, we may get very caught up in our own thoughts, which can make it
difficult to find solutions. If you are having a difficult time, you can talk
with a mental health professional who
can give you an unbiased perspective. You can also talk with a trusted friend
or family member, they may have had similar experiences or just suggestions
about things you can try.
- Don’t let the stigma that often surrounds therapy discourage you from trying it. Nearly everyone can benefit from being able to talk about their fears and worries with an unbiased person.
Sunday, 14 January 2018
Career Advice: A Letter to My 25 Year Old Self
00:00:00
I recently came across a very catchy and thought provoking article on LinkedIn by Shane Rodgers titled “The career advice I
wish I had at 25”. He said a bit about how we get to look back years
from now and wish we had the opportunity to use a time machine once, go
back in time to give our youthful selves a lecture or two on the things
you should have done differently.
He said:
“In
the future, when we turn 50, we will each be given a ticket to a time
machine and, just once, we will be able to go back in time and talk to
our 25-year-old selves.
Even
then, time travel will be expensive and wreak havoc with frequent flyer
programs. So there will only be one trip. So what if we could? What
would we say? What advice would we give?
I often wish I could do this. Just once. So, just in case the time machine ever comes along, this is the career advice I would give my 25-year-old self.”
Since
I know using a time travelling machine is an incomprehensible feat, at
least not for now and in the foreseeable future and as a young rookie
who belongs to the group that believes in the school thought that says
“It is better to learn from the mistakes of others, You can’t live long
enough to make them all yourself”.
Here are few golden nuggets of wisdom I picked from Shane’s article:
Take a Chill Pill:
Haha; yes he mentioned this but not in those exact words. Allow yourself get a breather, a career isn’t
a race or a marathon affair. The prime of our lives comes with serious
youthful exuberance and impatience but as we get older we realize that
there is that life and the careerwe decide to pursue in it should be treated with a long term approach.
Take
life in strides, allow yourself time to breathe and grow. Things will
fall in place if you work hard and allow yourself time to get good at
things but if you choose to overwhelm yourself with work, you end up
empty and tired, wearing yourself out and lose all the joy it takes to
do a good job.
Failure is not defeat:
As
bizarre as it may sound, failure is one of the best ways to learn, it
serves as a part of the process to eliminate unsuccessful options.
Richard Branson’s first venture was a magazine run by students. He
visualized the brand would eventually include banks and travel companies. He obviously failed at this first attempt in business and several others but got his big break with Virgin Airlines.
Thomas
Edison, the famous inventor once said: “I have not failed. cxI have
just found 10,000 ways that don’t work.” Take some risk, do not let the
fear of failure limit your reach and approach to all the wonderful
opportunities around.
Sometimes
failing spectacularly is the best evidence that we are alive, human and
serious about aspiring to the extraordinary. There is no value in being
ordinary when you have the capacity to be remarkable.
Several Real Successes come from Repetition, not new things:
More
often than not, Real Success comes from repetition. You don’t have to
wait for that mind blowing, ground breaking and never-heard-of idea.
Most of the real success stories you have ever heard of were as a result
of sheer persistence and determination to do old things in better way
persistently.
Thomas
Edison made a thousand unsuccessful attempts to create the light bulb,
but his persistence paid off. The book Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell
perfectly explains that you need to spend at least 10,000 hours on
something to become a true expert at it. Perfect examples include; The
Beatles who honed their performance skills through several gigs in
Hamburg, a very important part of their success story and Bill Gates
who, through a series of unplanned accidents, spent more time than
almost anyone else on a computer.
“The
lesson here is get good at things before you try to move to the next
thing. Genuine expertise belongs to an elite few. They seldom have
superpowers. They usually have endurance, patience and take a long-term
view. They also love what they do. If your find that, don’t let it go.”
Have a genuine interest in whatever field you find yourself:
A lot people complain about how their present career path
has failed to provide fulfilment and they fail to spend time learning
about the business. Here is a story of President J F Kennedy’s visit to
NASA, he met a man who happened to be a cleaner and asked what his job
was. The cleaner replied that he sent rockets to the moon. As mundane as
his task seemed, he felt he was a part of something bigger. We should
take a leaf from this and be a part of the big picture. Feel like a part
of what organization do and be connected to the true objectives of your
workplace.
A network of age-similar people is overrated:
Several
intelligent young people are plagued with the whiz kid syndrome. They
form series of network made up of smart young people who exchange ideas
and social interest with members of the same peer. Beware of the smart
young thang syndrome, building a youth only enclave can be totally
restrictive.
Network
and feed off the energy of the older generation as much as you can, as
they are experienced and can serve as useful mentors who can help open
doors and fast track careeradvancement.
What other advice would you add to this list? I’d be interested in hearing your thoughts in the comments below.
Written by: Mariam Banwo Barry
Monday, 9 October 2017
6 Tips To Make Your Life Easier
06:44:00
1.
Consider
getting a work-from-home job.
If you’re really feeling overwhelmed and feeling like there just aren’t enough
hours in a day for you to get everything done, then consider getting a job
where you can work from home or have more flexible hours. Though you will have
to work just as hard at home, you will have the luxury of avoiding a long
commute and you may be able to find more flexible hours that fit your schedule.
- Working from home isn’t for everybody. You have to be hardworking and self-motivated to be able to take the work seriously.
2.
Consider a
radical change. Maybe working a 70-hour-a-week job
just isn’t the thing you want. Maybe you want to switch career paths all
together. Maybe your relationship isn’t bringing you satisfaction anymore but
it’s sucking up all of your time. Maybe you love your job, but the 2-hour
commute a day is killing you and you may need to move. Take a look at the big
picture and see if there are any major changes you can make that can help you
feel in control.
3.
Be more
selfish. That’s right. Stop doing things
because your mother/bestfriend/co-worker/neighbor really need you to do them.
Do them because it’s what you want to do to make your life feel meaningful and
manageable. Commit to yourself before you commit to anyone else and make sure
you don’t overbook yourself just to fit someone else’s needs.
- It’s important to learn to say no to people and to stop feeling guilty about it. If you say yes to everyone else, you’ll always be saying no to yourself.
4.
Try to
monetize your passion. Do you
really love photography, writing, interior decorating, or cooking? It’s a
pretty radical step, but see if you can actually make money doing it, if not
making a full living out of it. It may seem like a stretch, but if you have the
talent and are willing to put in more time to pursue your dreams, then imagine
how rewarded you’ll feel when you get to spend more time doing what you love
and to make money from doing it.
- You may be feeling overwhelmed because you’re trying to make time to succeed in a career you don’t really care about as well as make time for pursuing your passion. This is a great way to change that.
5.
Do a “time
audit” on your life. At the beginning of your week,
start tracking how you spend every hour of your life. Be honest: if you spent
half an hour texting your BFF or deciding what to wear, write it down. If you
wasted forty-five minutes gossiping over chat, write it down. At the end of the
week, take a look at what you’ve done with your time and see where you can be
more efficient, which things you can cut out, and what you’d like to do more.
Then, create a “dream week” for yourself and try to follow it the following
week.
- You may find that you spent a total of two hours emailing people. Can you cut that down to one hour and make an extra hour for exercise?
- If you see that you’ve spent sixty hours doing work, it may be time to think about taking down your hours.
6.
Ask
yourself, “What is the most important thing I can be doing right now?” In the classic time management book, How to Get Control
of Your Time and Your Life, by Alan Lakein, he asks his readers this very
important question. It’s a simple question, but it’s very effective in making
you see what you should really be doing – instead of what someone else thinks
you should be doing – to get the most done and to feel the most in control of
your day.
- The next time you feel overwhelmed, take a minute to breathe and ask yourself this question, and you may be surprised by what you discover.
Friday, 18 August 2017
Coordinating Family Finances
08:44:00
To
live a happy and peaceful life with financial freedom, it's very important to
manage family finances properly. Failing to manage spending or agree on
financial decisions can cause a married couple to fall into endless arguing. To
get through the many financial decisions present in married life, you have to
coordinate a budget and financial planning with the whole family and keep an
open dialogue going about the family's money.
Talk
openly about your finances.
While this is important all the way through life, it is especially important to
establish financial honestly before you get married. If one partner has a poor
credit history or large debts that are not brought up before marriage, it can
lead to resentment and problems down the road. Before getting married, you
should meet with your loved one and discuss his current financial situation,
including how much he makes, where that money goes, his credit history, and any
large debts he is carrying. This sets the tone for financial openness in the
rest of your lives together.
Meet
regularly to talk about money.
Decide on a time of the month to get together specifically to discuss your
finances. Perhaps this meeting can coincide with the arrival of the monthly
bank statement or the due date of monthly bills. In any case, use your time at
this meeting to assess the previous month's expenditures, mark your progress
towards long-term goals, and to propose any changes or major purchases that you
want to make. Only by talking about money regularly can you make doing so a
comfortable and productive experience.
Don't make one person the sole manager of the
family's money.
Many families choose to allow one person to take charge of all the family's
finances; however, this places an unnecessary burden on that person and leads
to others' being unaware of the family's current financial situation. In
addition, if that person leaves through death or divorce, it leaves the others
completely unaware of how to manage or even access the family's finances. Solve
this problem by splitting up tasks between you or by managing finances in
alternating months.
- Both you and your spouse should attend any meetings with financial professionals, such as those with a loan officer or investment advisor.
Decide on an account setup. Families
have options when it comes to setting up joint accounts. Some choose to keep
everything together while others keep their finances mostly separate. At
minimum, you should have a joint account to pay for household expenses and your
mortgage payment. At the end of the month, you can split these expenses in half
and each transfer in an equal amount of money into this account to pay these
expenses. Having separate account can prevent arguments that might arise from
one person's spending habits.
- Just make sure to set limits to how much money each of you can spend each month so that one person doesn't end up spending all of the family's money.
Build up individual credit. Even
though your finances will be combined, it is still important for each of you to
have a strong credit score. Doing so will ensure not only that your credit will
be good when you apply for credit jointly, but also that your credit history
will remain intact if you split up. A simple way to manage this is by having
separate credit cards, each established only in the name of the spouse who uses
it.
Monday, 7 August 2017
Dealing With Negative People
09:19:00
Everyone has that friend or coworker
who sucks the energy right out of you, complaining about all the different ways
the world is set against him or her. Unfortunately, you must deal with many
different negative people throughout your life. However, negativity by others
can have an effect on your personal well-being, too. So to take care of your
own well-being, it is important to avoid it when possible, and neutralize it if
possible. Fortunately, there are ways to deal with negative people.
Remember
that you do not have to try to cheer them up, solve their problems, or have a
solution. It is laudable
to try to turn things around for them. However, keep in mind you may not be
able to succeed, and it is not typically your job to do so. In dealing with
negative people, it is also important to have good boundaries for yourself.
- Sometimes the best way to deal with negative people is for you to remain positive and ignore their negativity.
- Unsolicited advice is rarely taken. Wait until the person tells you they would like to hear your ideas.
- Sometimes there is good reason for a person to be in a negative state; honor where they are. The best way to annoy a person in a bad mood is to tell them they should not be. While that may be true, it will not be helpful.
- Be a good example in being positive. Sometimes the best thing to do is to simply take a positive stance. Simply being positive and remaining positive in a sea of gloom will have an effect.
Provide
support. The first time
you encounter someone you know being negative, provide a listening,
compassionate ear. Try to help if he or she requests it. Everyone has a bad day
or needs a hand with something on occasion. Just being a helpful, compassionate
person can go a long way to spreading positivity.
- If the person continues to harp on the same negative topics, you feel emotionally exhausted after you socialize with them, and they overwhelmingly use negative words and phrases (I can’t, they didn’t, I hate, etc.), that’s when it's time to try to disarm their negativity.
Do
not engage in the negativity. It's really easy when confronted with a
negative person to get sucked into their spiral of negativity. Choosing not to
engage doesn't mean ignoring them, but it does mean maintaining your emotional
distance.
- Avoid trying to argue about why the person should not be negative. In an attempt to make negative people change their tune, the first instinct is to try to argue why the person should not be. Unfortunately, this tends not to work. People in a funk tend to have a lot of rationale why, and will typically have a lot of defenses to keep them there. You will likely spend a lot of time and effort for nothing, and maybe even get sucked into the dark cloud yourself.
- Negative people tend to exaggerate, focus on their negativity, and ignore the positive. Instead of trying to make them see how they're being negative (which usually only leads to confrontation and reinforcement of their ideas that everyone is against them), try giving noncommittal answers that neither encourage or condemn the negativity. This shows active listening without stating you agree.
- Noncommittal comments include: "Okay," or "I see".
- You can follow up with your own positive take, but try not to contradict the person: "I see. It is really hard when customers seem unappreciative like that. I try not to take it personally."
Use
appreciative inquiry.
If the person demonstrates negativity on certain events or subjects, you can
have a conversation with them using a technique called “appreciative inquiry.”
Appreciative inquiry is a process of asking questions to help the person
envision a more positive future. If they are complaining about a past event,
you can ask questions focusing on the positive aspects of their experiences or
pose questions about the future.
- These questions might include, “What do you hope would happen next time?” or “What turned out to be positive about that experience?”
- This question should lead to a story about what a brighter future would look like and how to achieve that future.
Steer the
conversation.
If appreciative inquiry does not lead to a productive, positive conversation,
then gently turn the conversation toward something more innocuous.
- For example, you might say, “I understand that you’re upset about your coworker. That must have been hard. So, tell me more about your plans for this weekend.” Or, “Wow, that sounds like an ordeal. So, did you see that new documentary?”
Attempt to
disrupt negative ruminations. Rumination (going over the same negative
thoughts over and over) only reinforces negativity. It is also associated with
higher levels of depression. If the person tends to ruminate, see if you can
disrupt this spiral by leading the person to focus on something else.
- While steering the conversation can include leading the person to a happier topic within the same subject, disrupting negative rumination likely means changing the subject entirely. If the person is ruminating over a work interaction, try bringing up his or her favorite TV show, the person’s beloved pet, or something else likely to result in a more-positive conversation.
Help
the person see how they might take control of the situation. Negative people tend to blame all
external factors rather than themselves. People who blame their problems on
outside factors tend to have poorer emotional well-being than those who take a
different perspective. Try supporting the negative person in developing a plan
for how to handle negative events.
- Venting about a negative situation isn’t necessarily an unhealthy response. We often work through problems and develop a course of action to deal with the problem during this phase. Try to help the person channel the negative energy in a constructive way. You can ask, for instance, what the person can do to change an unfavorable situation at work.
Help
the person accept negative events. In addition to talking the person through how
to react to a negative event, you can also help the person with ultimately
accepting negative events. For example, imagine a friend was reprimanded at
work for coming in late. She complains to you at lunch, lamenting the fact that
she has to take the bus, complaining that her boss has it out for her, etc. You
can try saying several things in this situation, such as:
- “Well, the reprimand has already been filed, and that won’t change but it will be taken off your record in six months. You can show your boss that you are committed to being on time from now on.”
- “What if you rode your bike to work instead? Then you wouldn’t have to rely on the bus being on time, and you could leave your house a little later.”
- "You're really upset by that, I can tell. I'm really sorry that happened. If you'd like some help getting organized in the morning, I find that's really helpful in getting out on time. Let me know if you'd like me to do that."
Set
boundaries.
When dealing with negative people, set boundaries for how you deal with them.
Someone else negativity is not your responsibility to deal with. If they're
bringing you down too much, you need to spend time away from them.
- If the negative person is a work colleague, cut short their negative spiral by telling them you have to get back to work. Do it nicely, otherwise it will feed their negativity further.
- If the negative person is a family member (especially one that you live with), try taking a break from them as much as possible. Go out to a library or nearby coffee shop or simply don't answer the phone every time they call.
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